By Zainab Susi
It doesn’t matter where we come from. We may differ in gender, genes, and our families but we have more in common than not. Our guardians are important people in our lives. Some people are blessed to know and love both of their parents, some have wonderful guardians in their found families, and some people don’t know anything about their parents.
I only knew my mother, Ami. When I was three years old my father, Abu, passed away from a heart attack. His death was a complete shock for Ami. Growing up, we would ask Ami lots of questions but it was a very sensitive topic. She shared about his life as much as she could. At an early age I learned not to ask her anything that would upset her.
I have no memories of Abu, but I have seen his pictures and some personal belongings. Growing up, many relatives said I looked just like him. I always liked that. They also said I was sensitive, caring, and cared about family, like him. I got many of his traits, but didn’t know what those were. Ami kept many of his belongings such as his coat, camera, and briefcase. I tried to know him through his belongings. Ami kept his file very carefully and wouldn’t share it with anyone. After she passed away, I took my time and sat down with his files and I was surprised at how much there was to learn. I knew he was born in India and immigrated to Pakistan in the early 1950’s. But I had no idea about his life in India, what kind of student he was, how many sports he played, his education, and more.
I learned that his full name was Mohammed Madar Susi. He was born on February 15, 1939 and died on March 17, 1969. He spoke three languages; Urdu, English and Farsi. He received his Pakistani citizenship in 1952, attended Karachi University and graduated with honors. He wrote short stories and had very nice handwriting.
I also learned he was an athlete, he played volleyball, competed in pole vault, swim relays, and more. He won many prizes in his sports as well. The more I learned, the more I wish I could have known him. I didn’t know that both of my parents were born on February 15th.
Growing up we were poor, our circumstances were limited, and that’s why I couldn’t achieve many of my dreams. As soon as I got the opportunity I went back to school and got my bachelor’s degree. I always liked sports and chose to practice taekwondo later in life. I went all the way to receiving a black belt and can now teach others. Writing has always been a passion for me as well. I don’t have a journalism degree but I enjoy writing short stories like Abu. I published a book and for many years I have written for newspapers.
I always asked the question, why me? Why do I have his traits and none of my sisters do. I am glad. I feel lucky and special. I feel close to him and I am proud he was my father. I miss him. Spend as much time as you can and create memories with the ones you love. Once they are gone, you will miss them deeply. They are very important people in our lives.
“Any man can be a Father but it takes someone special to be a dad.” — Anne Geddes
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Life is beautiful!
