By Zainab Susi
In the first week of May 2022, my daughter’s and I met in Maine. We’re all in different places geographically and my eldest thought this would be a good place for us to plan a trip to. None of us had ever been there, but we’d all heard it was a beautiful state to visit. The rumors were true, the mountain views alongside the coastal backdrop are stunning. It was one of my daughter’s birthday that weekend and it happened to coincide with Mother’s Day weekend. Her wish was to go hiking in the mountains all day. The two of them planned the whole trip, the hiking trails we’d follow and the places we’d see but didn’t tell me the specific route. All I knew was that we’d be hiking a lot. They knew if they had told me I would’ve said NO. I am glad they didn’t tell me in advance. At the age of 50, for the very first time I hiked to the top of a mountain. Penobscot Mountain is ingrained in my memory.
All my life I have had a fear of heights and the older I become I’ve felt more anxious and more risk averse. It’s easy to say, “Just face your fears”, because when you are facing your fear it is scary. When you’re least aware you can lose your confidence quickly and let fear take over.
Pretty quickly into the hike I learned that we were going to the top of the mountain. What I didn’t know at the time was that Penobscot Mountain is one of the most difficult hikes in Acadia National Park. There were many areas with extremely steep cliffs and narrow ledges. Honestly, I was terrified and afraid of falling and getting hurt. Whenever we took breaks I tried to focus on as many positive thoughts as I could. I prayed, focused on my breathing, meditated, and told myself to take one step at a time.
I tried to separate my negative thoughts from reality, but it was very hard to do. My mind was making me fearful of the unknown, when in reality all three of us were more than fine. We were witnessing the world’s natural beauty together. I am glad my girls don’t have a fear of heights. They were looking around, down the mountain, taking pictures and enjoying the incredible gift around them. When we reached the top it was an indescribable view and I felt so accomplished.
I am glad I didn’t let fear take over me. The three of us will remember this experience for the rest of our lives. This lucky mother feels so blessed that my adult daughters could have picked their friends or just the two of them for a weekend trip. But they wanted their mom to be with them. No words can describe how lucky I am.
In the end if I had let fear take over, I wouldn’t have created beautiful memories with my girls at Acadia National Park. We went to places like Thunder Hole, saw a beautiful breathtaking sunrise view at Cadillac Mountain, and also
visited Bass Harbor Lighthouse. We also celebrated a birthday and Mother’s Day together.
It’s been 3 days since I returned home and I couldn’t stop thinking about how much power we give to fear even though we know fear has no power. We feel scared of taking risks. Hiking up a mountain or not, we are all taking risks in many ways every single day. Let’s try to take charge of our life, live fully without fear, and enjoy each day as if it’s our last day on the planet.
Thank you to my girls who let me have this beautiful, lifetime experience. I’m glad they trusted me more than I trusted myself.
Life is beautiful!
